Intern Hunting Program*
To be an effective intern your experience must include more than exposure to our workload. To this extent, we encourage participation in other worldly endeavors. It has been our experience that a well-rounded intern should assume a naturalist posture toward life; experiencing the balance between predator and prey that is often replicated in the adversarial nature of our profession.
Given our finite time together and to facilitate your rapid acquisition of these life lessons, you are cordially invited to participate in the small, yet exclusive club, of the Red Mist. Acceptance into the club is multi-tiered.
The initial level of membership, Apprentice, is not defined, but yet characterized by a willingness and enthusiasm to shoot small, fury creatures. Further considerations given to this position include flexibility in time management and familiar obligations. Food always scores points. There is no formal petition to apply for membership. However, your interest may be documented with a copy of the letter sent to your local representative detailing your utter contempt regarding the Sunday hunting limitations and your position that hunting is a right guaranteed by the Pennsylvania and federal Constitutions.
The next step in your rapid rise toward self-actualization and assured success in your legal profession is to enable and support the Shooters.
We believe only in the demonstration of supreme fire discipline, target location, spotting skills and carcass marking and retrieval (when required) can a Red Mist Apprentice ascend to the rank of Shooter.
Prerequisites to participate in the apprentice program include: an open attitude.
To elevate to the Shooter program: small caliber, high velocity rifle, with exceptional optics (no less than 3 x 9), binoculars, 100 inches of blaze orange in the shape of a hat, current PA hunting license, valid membership in The Varmint Hunters Association, tolerance for cigar smoke, willingness to commute on the hump or bed of a pickup truck, and free time.
* Subject to change without notice, no implied or expressed or any other warranties. The plausible deniability of the existence of the Red Mist should not be construed as a bar to participation. Indeed, the complete opposite controls.
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